‘Scooter Trash’: Art Porn By A Bunch Of Bikers

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Scooter Trash (1985) Directed by Boz Crawford 80 min.

The way I heard about this movie was through Jeff Krulik’s 1996 documentary short King of Porn, about Ralph Whittington, owner of one of the largest pornography collections in the world. His collection currently resides at the Museum of Sex.

One of the pornos Ralph talks about in the doc is Scooter Trash, which features real bikers from upstate NY. Being a NYC native and a fan of all things unique when it comes cinema, I had to track it down.

It was surprisingly easy to find a torrent for it and download it—I guess there are a handful of Scooter Trash fans out there seeding it 24/7. Good on them for doing so, because this is a pretty remarkable movie.

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The film opens with a woman’s eye. Thus begins an un-erotic sequence in which we see this woman get a real tattoo on her ass. It is a tattoo of the title of the film.

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I’ve never seen an opening sequence like this. It’s ballsy as hell, showing right off the bat a staggering amount of commitment to the project by those involved. It screams, with pride, ‘this is not just a mere film—this is a lifestyle’, and you believe them. You can’t not—the tattoo is undeniable, visceral proof.

We are then plopped into the world they are so proud of. It is trashy and dirty, yet strangely calm and serene—as green as it is brown. Stories are shared, and handjobs are given just because:

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What follows is a series of porn vignettes, loosely linked in that they are stories being told of past sexual encounters the bikers have had. Not all of these shorts are good—in fact, the best of them, the first one, is only half-good. But the half that’s good is mesmerizing—just look at this gorgeous, Eric Rohmer-esque lighting, and the delectable purple lens flare:

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The second half of this first vignette, though weaker, is not without its own charm. The vibe of the bike shop is similar to the QuickStop of Clerks—the owner even has a similar delivery and look to that of Dante. And there are a couple clever dutch angles, and one or two truly beautiful shots, as seen below. Ultimately though, this half is marred by its grossness—in particular, there’s an anal scene where more comes out of one actress’ ass than mere semen. Don’t worry, I didn’t snap a pic of it:

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In general, the sex in this film is trashy and weird. None of it is particularly erotic, although many of the actresses are quite attractive. But, it is consistent in its trashiness and weirdness, which makes it the sex at least somewhat interesting, and undeniably an artistic statement. Much like the protagonists of Harmony Korine’s Trash Humpers have their own unique sense of humor that is funny to them, these bikers have a brand of sex that is truly their own. And in its best moments, this sex is presented with an unexpected sensitivity and togetherness:

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The shirts in the movie are great, by the way. You saw an awesome one earlier in that dutch angle, and here are two more: (If you can’t tell, the one below reads ‘I’d Rather Eat Shit Than Ride A Kawasaki’)

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Even in weak scenes, there are touches of brilliance to be found. These shots of Ron Jeremy receiving a blowjob feel like social commentary—I love the bizarre sleep mask and off-kilter television:

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The film ends with a montage of the actresses in the film who have been in Iron Horse, a biker magazine. It’s a great sequence, if only for the phrase ‘Iron Horse covercunt’ which I look forward to using as an obscure insult:

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Disappointingly, the tattoo in the end credits is clearly not real, mere ink on skin as opposed to the one at the start. But, it’s a charming, chilling image in its own right:

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Seek this film out if you dug the stills I took. However beautiful some of these images are, they’re even better in motion. And I left a lot of interesting stuff out, for you to discover on your own.

4 out of 5 Codys.

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7 Responses to ‘Scooter Trash’: Art Porn By A Bunch Of Bikers

  1. Ed Mullins says:

    I wanted to thank you for your insightful and brilliant piece on Scooter Trash. I came across your writing because I became intrigued by what other work the director Boz Crawford might have done. So I Googled him and found your critique. I wanted to know whether Mr. Crawford was one hit wonder in the Charles Laughton vein or more of an under-appreciated auteur like Doris Wishman.
    Since I was a kid I had an obsession with outlaw bikers, and this masterpiece is my holy grail. A review caught my eye in an edition of Hustler I was thumbing through, and I began an immediate quest to obtain the VHS as an adolescent. It wasn’t easy. I even summoned up the nerve to call Flynt Publications and ask some random person who the distributor was (Caballero Home Video) and buy it with a postal money order. As a biker myself, the crude charm, low production values and “let’s put on a show” panache give the work an authentic and demented charm. Sadly, its star, Crazy Ace, has been riding his hog in the great beyond since 2009, but he totally eclipses the presence of adult film stalwarts Ron Jeremy and Rhonda Jo Petty. (In fact, the presence of the established stars actually detracts from the work.) A few of his lines such as “Suck my dick and maybe I’ll let you wash my bike” could have come from early Mamet. The DIY feel of Scooter Trash foreshadows the amateur adult video crazy by many years. So I’m thrilled, sir, that you were able to give this under appreciated the critical love it deserves. I have a large collection of biker porn and have uploaded the best on XHamster.com. Scooter Trash is the only film where I’ve uploaded the entire thing and the best scenes, due to high views counts and commentary. My sincerest thanks. Ride, fuck and fight. Ed

    • Cody Clarke says:

      Ed,

      Thank you so much for the kind words! Glad you enjoyed the piece, and it’s great to hear there’s someone else out there who understands the merit of this film. Are there any other titles that you’d suggest I check out?

      Best,
      Cody

      • Ed Mullins says:

        Hi Cody, there are no other titles with Scooter Trash’s unique credentials that I’ve found. If you want to check out more conventional biker porn, just go to Xhamster.com and search for biker. Find Scooter Trash and click on my profile. My entire “best of” is uploaded there. In terms of popularity, I’d say there is this very rare rape fantasy scene I uploaded featuring a young Max Hardcore and the late John Doe that seems really get people going.

      • Dave says:

        I can’t seem to find the name of the Spanish looking girl having sex in Bike Shop? The only girl that looks Spanish with dark hair? Who is that?

  2. Paul says:

    The spanish chick is Karly Carlyn. She was in the September ’85 issuse of Iron Horse Magazine. She also went by Barbie Doll Carlyn. I can’t find anything else about her, seems like she just disappeared.

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