You Are Worth Less, Alec Baldwin: A Review-ish Rant on ‘Seduced and Abandoned’

seduced


Seduced and Abandoned (2013)
Written and Directed by James Toback
98 min.

Spoiler-free.

The title of this review contains one of the greatest puns I’ve ever made in my entire life. (To get it, you have to be aware of the song ‘You Are Worthless, Alec Baldwin’, which plays at the very end of the credits of Team America: World Police.) What makes my pun so great and so apt is that this documentary, Seduced and Abandoned, is literally about Alec Baldwin thinking he’s worth a lot more money than he is actually worth, and constantly being reminded by various knowledgable people that he isn’t, and him not understanding. That’s the majority of this movie, which might make it sound like the greatest movie ever made, but unfortunately, it isn’t. It’s downright grating in its unrelenting narcissism. There are parts where you’ll damn near groan your throat off, and eye roll your eyes off. But you should still watch it. It may not be a good film, but it sure as hell is an important one.
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10 Awful Movies People Think Are Cool

troy

Troy Duffy, director of a ‘cool’, albeit awful, movie.

‘Coolness’ is hard to define, as it should be.  I suspect it’s difficult because coolness is an X factor.  It’s the swagger generated by the totality of a bunch of compartmentalized variants or something.  It’s also because coolness is not a science, it’s a feeling.  However, like most things, although it can’t be defined, it can be explained.  And, contrary to popular belief, explaining it is fun.  It doesn’t ‘kill it’ as so many pseudo-smart, sanctimonious anti-thought peddlers would have you believe.
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